Nerd jokes

Sometimes, when people look overly intellectual or they lack some basic social skills, they are called nerds or geeks. If you have friends like these or if other people treat you like this, you will enjoy the following nerd jokes. Why should you take seriously what other people think about you? Just take yourself as you are, do what you really enjoy and do not take life too seriously. If you see that your friend is addicted to a computer too much, you can send him these computer puns and try to explain to him what real conversation is. It is much more pleasant to go outside than to sit in front of the screen all day long.

Nerd Jokes

Nerd jokes on images

What Do You Call An Educated Tube? A graduated cylander.

What Is A Cation Afraid Of? Dogions.

How Many Surrealists Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb? A Fish.

Descartes Walks Into A Bar. The Bartender Asks If He Wants A Drink Descartes answers, “I think not” and disappears.

What’s Another Name For Santa’s Elves?Subordinate Clauses.

Heisenberg is pulled over by a cop who asks him, “Do you know how fast you were going?” Heisenberg replies, “No, but I know where I am.”

Why does a burger have less energy than a steak? A burger is in its ground state.

Funny Nerd Jokes

Do you like humor about nerds? Check out this impressive and super funny nerd jokes collection. These jokes will make you laugh like crazy. If your friend is working in IT business and spends too much time in from of his computer, you should send him these hilarious funny computer jokes and convince him to meet you for a coffee.

Funny nerd jokes on photos

Q: What does a proud computer call his little son?  A: A microchip off the old block.

Q: Why do accountants make good lovers? A: They’re great with figures.

How Many Theoretical Physicists Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?Two. One to hold the lightbulb, and one to rotate the universe.

A logician’s wife is having a baby. Straight after the birth the doctor hands the baby to the father. The wife asks impatiently, “Is it a boy or a girl?” The logician replies, “Yes.”

Q: How can you tell if a computer geek is an extrovert?  A: They stare at your shoes when you talk instead of their own.

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist? A: If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium.

Geek Jokes

Some people are addicted to computers. They have no social skills at all. Such people are called geeks. Below, you will find a lot of fabulous geek jokes which you should share online.

Geek jokes on illustrations

Lotteries are a tax on people who suck at math.

“I’m not interrupting you, I’m putting our conversation in full-duplex mode.”
– Antone Roundy

Q: Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas?
A: Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC.

An SQL statement walks into a bar and sees two tables. It approaches, and asks “may I join you?”

What’s a Physicist’s Favorite Food?Fission Chips.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says, “I’ll have some H20.” The second one says, “I’ll have some H20 too.” The second one dies.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

Programming is like sex, one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

Computer Dirty Jokes

People who avoid any contact with people and prefer to have online friends are a bit strange. Computers can’t replace real life. That is why such people behave very odd. These computer dirty jokes perfectly describe this kind of people.

Computer dirty jokes on images

When you’re a full-stack developer but still want to credit everyone

Not gonna lie, I’d be a little worried.

My local supermarket stocks the Raspberry Pi magazines in the cooking section

Computer Programmers! Are there any funny or sexy pick-up lines with CS references?

Q: Why can’t cats work on the computer?  A: They get too distracted chasing the mouse around.

What did E.T.’s mother say to him when he got home? “Where on Earth have you been?!”

Why Did Karl Marx Dislike Earl Grey Tea?Because all proper tea is theft.

Q: What is the chemical formula for “banana”? A: BaNa2